First of all, thanks for all the advice :), I really appreciate it!
So I decided on a course of action. When I woke up, my roommate was still sleeping and I was left a passive agressive note about my noise in the morning. Since she was still sleeping and I wanted to start my day, I simply erased it and wrote, “This is a dialogue that we should have.” I started my day by going for a run to decompress and when I came back, there was another note saying in big bold letters, “So bring it up.”
That really lit my fire, I was hot, sticky, and tired and it was only 9 am. She had left for class and I immediately texted her,
“You’re the one with the problem and leaving passive aggressive notes. Shut your door or get ear plugs. I won’t grind coffee but I’m going to make smoothies. I deal with you waking me up whenever you get home. You can do the same.”
Eh. It was early, I was grumpy. She responded, “I’d like to talk tonight if you have time. Or tomorrow afternoon if that works better.” Why couldn’t she have said this in the morning instead of leaving the note.
I responded with what time worked best and when that time came around, she didn’t show up and our cat was gone. She was more than 30 minutes late and continued to get ready to go out while we were “talking”. Essentially, she apologized and we reached the compromise I suggested about not making coffee. I feel as though this is going to bite her in the butt because in 3 days I’m done with early mornings but she nannies all summer starting at 7 AM, and she’s probably going to want coffee.
But the kicker is the cat, I’ve posted pictures with Gatsby before, and Gatsby and I spend a lot of time together because I do most of my homework from home. This was a really low blow. When I asked about him, she said he was gone to her parents house indefinitely because he causes problems between us. I think it’s essentially that she doesn’t want to do the litterbox. I cried a little last night over it, I know it’s stupid but I really liked that cat, I would have been willing to take care of him if she would have asked.